kindness really is punk rock
There's always nuance, but also a baseline.
I've taken a fair share of punches. Kicks in the side, punted on the chest and shoves all around. To my shame, I've also sent some back. ‘Whatever’, I say now. We were children. 'Boys will be boys,' some say. Never really felt like an excuse. Probably because it isn’t. Not in any scenario. And I haven't fought since I turned twelve years old. Probably longer, to be honest.
Today, I turn 21 years old.
Sometimes, very rarely, I take a punch.
Could be from a drunk at the train station, trying to grab my snack. Or a shove outside of the cinema. Hell, these days even a challenging comment on the way I walk hits like a truck. But I'm glad I don't fight anymore. A feeling of fear persists, but that ultimately makes way for anger. I still get angry.
Much of my childhood has been defined by fear and anger. I don't like thinking or looking back on those times much. Many folks love to rewatch home videos from years ago, or see a picture on the wall and reminisce about 'the good ol' days'. That's never really done much for me. I'd rather not think about that. Those experiences made me who I am, and now I must focus on projecting the best of that outward.
Those strong emotions from way back all stem from a feeling of disbelief that I still experience to this day. The disbelief that you'd consciously belittle another. Actively hurting someone. To be honest, we all do it in some way at one point in our lives. But not the slightest sliver of regret? When I look back on years ago, I remember the utter confusion and disbelief that people could just do that to another person. "What do you gain out of it?" Is kindness not fulfilling enough?
Today, I turn 21 years old.
I still don't get it, and the problem only got bigger. Bullies on the playground became bullies in suits, who supress medicine and aid. Who bomb families for petty grudges. Bullies became the crowd outside of a pride parade, speaking of salvation of a disease that only exists in their mind.
I understand how our experiences shape us, and that these kinds of conflicts are fundamental to the human experience, but I still don't get it. Just like when I was an angry child, it fills me with disbelief that we can't at the very least treat each other with decency. Of course there's nuance. This is the real world. But it doesn't feel like it should be this hard.
Being kind goes against the norm in this day and age. So yeah, I'd call that punk rock. It was vindicating beyond description to see a beacon of hope like the Man of Steel bring that message this year. Unfortunately fiction is one of the few places where a world of decency feels achievable.
But I believe in the effects of kindness. Whatever its influence might achieve, proves the little boy's believe that this world is an irredeemable place of cruelty wrong. I've been trying to for the past ten years.
